Big Ben can ring my bell anytime *sigh*

When Welsh rugby player Gareth Thomas came out last week, he stated that he was worried about the reaction from his teammates. He needn’t have worried. Rugby is far more gay friendly than football. So while the Pink News reports that premier league footballers dare not support an anti-homophobia campaign for fear of what it would do to their (carefully coiffered, plucked and waxed) images, their rugby counterparts seem hell-bent on getting some exposure in various calendars available on a link on a gay website near you.

The prime example is Ben Cohen, who appeared in the Rugby World Cup winning 2003 line up. Despite being a happily heterosexual rugby player, Ben has long recognised that he is a hit with the lads more than the ladies – I’d guess that say 90% of the fans on his Facebook group page are men, and they aren’t there for the rugby tips. They’re there for the pictures that Ben posts up of his beefcake self.

So it is with great excitement that I received Ben’s 2010 Calendar, which will be well hung in my office. Alongside the “Ben in his kit, Ben in his suit” shots, Ben has thrown in an extra, tasteful – and I quote from his website – “centrefold of shower shots”. Now if that isn’t ruthlessly exploiting appealing to the instincts of your gay fanbase, I don’t know what is. Football’s preening prima donnas should take note at what a real man is: One that isn’t afraid to get his kit off for the lads.

Hotness of the Week

Gethin Jones, of Blue Peter and Strictly Come Dancing fame. Because everyone loves a Welsh boy! ;o)

2007: How was it for you?

Fed up with 2007 Reviews of the Year yet? Tough! here’s the Sloth’s highlights of 2007

Man Of The Year: Dermot O’Leary. Oh how we rejoiced when Ice Queen Kate Thornton was replaced with Dermot on X-Factor, and he didn’t disappoint, by camping it up, blubbing and giving the male contestants (not the girls) big manhugs. The best talent on X-factor by far.

Woman Of The Year: Amy Winehouse. Outrageously talented, and sadly a celebrity blogger’s dream. And with the best-selling album of the year, she proves there’s no such thing as bad publicity.

Celebrity Mess of the Year: Amy Winehouse

Car of the Year Not Including the Mini: The Maserati Granturismo. Can you imagine turning up in one of these? Italian sex appeal without the embarrassment of owning a Ferrari.

Car Most Likely to get Keyed Outside my House if I Owned One: Maserati Granturismo.

Car of the Year including the MINI: The MINI Cooper S I test drove. Just awesome. I want one!

Album of the Year: Amy Winehouse – Back to Black. Though released in 2006, I only really appreciated just how good this album this year. Real British soul music – you don’t hear Americans singing about being no good.

Singles of the Year – based on iTunes airplay, how often I sung it in the shower, and general fudging it:

1) Bleeding Love – Leona Lewis

2) Back to Black – Amy Winehouse
3) Umbrella – Rihanna
4) No One – Alicia Keys

5) Anonymous – Bobby Valentino
6) Promise-Ciara

7) Icebox-Omarion
8) Can’t Forget About You – Nas feat Chrisette Michele

9) Gotta Work – Amerie

10) Uninvited – Freemasons

Retailer of the Year: Ted Baker (of course)

Website of the Year: Facebook. So successful, my employer has blocked it.

Biggest Disappointments of the Year:

• The iPhone. Beautiful, but no 3G and an 18 month contract with O2? No thanks.
• Where was Whitney’s album?
• Having to challenge people about their racism in 2007.

Things I’m looking forward to in 2008:

• My Civil Partnership & honeymoon. Hooray!
• Cousin #1′s baby
• Cousin # 2′s baby
• Brother’s baby (blimey feeling left out, must adopt a goldfish or something)
• Mini Cooper S????! (had to put this last or my nearest and dearest will kill me!)

Right up my street

More gay drama on BBC1′s the Street, as a married man indulged in a bit of how’s yer father with Will Mellor. And who can blame him?

In summary I would say there was far too much kitchen sink angst, and far too few shots of Will Mellor with his kit off.

The Most Beautiful Man In The World?

This man is appearing on blogs and internet forums all over the place as apparently he’s been voted the “Most Beautiful Man In The World”.

Now I’m not sure if the competition even exists, but it has to be said, he’s rather nice don’t you think?!

Maturing Like A Fine Wine

Remember Craig David? He was massive in 2000 after launching his career with some sparky Garage-inspired hits. Sadly, he stuffed it up with a truly terrible single called What’s Your Flava, then went all Radio 2 on us, releasing one soporific ballad after another.

Well Craig’s back with a new single called Hot Stuff. It samples Bowie’s Let’s Dance. It’s a desperate attempt to resurrect his career using the “use really obvious sample” trick, and I suspect it isn’t going to work.

Of more interest is exactly when Craig turned from gawky bloke with odd shaped head to Hot Stuff. Answers on a postcard please.

How Old?

As of last week, I realistically can no longer claim to be in my “early 30s”. I was fine with this state of affairs until I read that my favourite Hollyoaks cast member, pouty Chris Fountain (left) was born in 1987!!!!!.

I remember 1987, I holidayed in Barbados with my brother, Thatcher won another election, and I Wanna Dance With Somebody by a fresh faced Whitney went to no1. This also means I’m nearly old enough to be Chris’ father. In my home town, I’m actually definitely old enough to be his father. I feel a bit like a dirty old man now.

One heartening thing, however, is the constantly shifting goalposts of growing old. Thinking of my grandparent’s generation, these were people with tough upbringings, who worked in industry and smoked like chimneys. Now my parents are nearing my grandparents age when I was a child, witnessing their rude health, designer clothes, hot hatchbacks, and texting on their mobiles gives hope.

And the goalposts will move again. In some respects it feels like trailblazing. It is very rare to see anyone of mixed race older than 50 in this country, so I lack reference points as to how I will look as an old man. And there are no old men who have had a civil partnership which has spanned decades.

So here’s to my midlife crisis. It would be rude to run off with a 25 year old with a civil partnership looming, but I can definitely go for that “buy a fast car” thing. A Mini Cooper S in fact.

The XXX Factor

Oh Joy! The new season of X-Factor has started to record ratings. I reckon the additional viewers are girls and gays tuning in to get a prime-time fix of our favourite metrosexual, Dermot O’Leary.

Yes, dreamy Dermot may be straight but he does a nice line in campery such as wagging his hips and squealing like a girl. Forget Simon Cowell or the no-hope contestants, this season is all about the Derms.

Something To Look At While We Wait For Leona…

Do you remember Shayne Ward? Thought not. he’s the guy that won the X-Factor the year before Leona Lewis.

With his last single stalling at number 14, Shayne has taken the hint that it’s not his music we appreciate him for and and he’s taken his top off. It’s an agreeable diversion while we wait for Leona’s single and album.

Leona isn’t doing covers of Unchained Melody like most X-Factor winners – she’s in the US, recording with producer Dallas Austin, who brought us such storming singles as Sugababes’ Push The Button. Also producing are Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis, whose defining moment was producing Nasty and What Have You Done For Me Lately for Janet Jackson.

Hopefully, this means she won’t be stuck in dreary 80s-style power ballad hell. The signs are good!

An Annoucement

Dermot O’Leary will be presenting the new series of X-Factor. Family and friends please note that I shall not be attending any events, gatherings or functions on Saturday nights as soon as the new series gets away.

I know it’s hard being dumped in favour of Dermot droolage, but I’m sure in time you will come to accept this and understand. Thank you.