“You spent how much on a MINI?!”- A familiar reaction when I tell enquiring friends exactly how much my MINI cost, after options. For this is not your aunt’s MINI One, it is the ultimate, turbocharged and tuned MINI John Cooper Works, 211hp, 0-60 in 6.5 seconds and a theoretical top Speed of 148mph. In a word: Yeeeha! But after 6000 miles, does the MINI justify its maxi price ?
Outside
I seem to be getting a lot of admiring glances from young men these days, unfortunately they just seem to be looking at my car. MINIs have completed a full-scale invasion of the streets of London, but this JCW with its striking Chili Red and black roof, definitely turns heads. With its standard JCW Aero kit, some very special looking alloy wheels and red brake callipers, this MINI is dressed to kill. The looks of the latest MINI have definitely improved with familiarity, but I still mourn the loss of the cutesy “beauty spot” separate indicators as seen on the first generation car. But you can’t have everything.
Inside
There are zillions of ways to configure your MINI interior, but to match the stonking performance, I went for a sporty look inside, with Carbon black punch leather seats and red “Colour Line” pads on the doors and dash. Then the option box ticking really started – the configurator on mini.co.uk can really get you all kinds of financial trouble. I stopped short of a TV tuner and free masseur (joke), but still added full leather seats, satellite navigation, upgraded Hi-Fi system, DAB Radio and sunroof. I was tempted to raid the accessories catalogue for all manner of carbon fibre trim goodies, but the eye-watering prices meant I stuck to an Alcantara and carbon fibre gear knob, and chequered flag floor mats and interior rear view mirror for a finishing touch.
Driving it
Firing up with the start button, and the JCW sports exhaust gives a throaty burble, and the MINI is ready to play. But whether you are the mood for your MINI to be a hooligan or merely a very fun runabout depends upon one thing – the Sport button. Leave it off, and the throttle response is just right for darting around town and London’s never-ending traffic jams. Put it on, and all hell breaks loose – press the accelerator and the JCW instantaneously launches forward on a tsunami of power. Sometimes this awesome torque wants to steer the car for you, making the wheel writhe in your hands, and you, the driver, must tame the beast! But it’s all apart of the feisty character and good clean fun – and clean it is – it emits around the same CO2 as my much, much slower MINI Cooper did 5 years ago.
All the way through the gears the JCW seems to have performance to spare – you rarely need to downshift, with a quick prod of the throttle usually enough to get you into a gap or out of trouble. The MINI eggs you on to overtake with its fierce throttle response, confident roadholding and the roar of the exhaust. If the iPod connectivity isn’t enough for you, you can switch off the music and listen to the infectious roar, burbles and pops that come from the JCW’s exhaust. You can just about hear the symphony from the cabin, but it is never intrusive.
The steering is meaty and nicely weighted and like any MINI, the JCW loves bends. On optional sports suspension (a must) the little beast corners flat as a pancake and grips and grips. Although slightly less interactive than the first generation MINI, it isn’t knocked off course as much by bumps. But the MINI’s triumph is how fun it is on the roads most of us drive every day – the darty steering and wheel at each corner make the MINI a car that brings a smile to your face in all manner of situations. Be it a quick flick round the corner to the shop, a right turn round a mini roundabout to the gym or a quick burst of power along an A-road to get to work, fun is always on the cards. And with its cheeky demeanour, other drivers seem to let you out of junctions in a way they wouldn’t if you were in, say, a BMW.
Living with it
Inside, the retro-inspired dash is solidly constructed. Only a few bits of cheap plastic let the side down, but all of it is scratch-proof. The Alcantara wheel and gear-knob have real feel appeal, as do the nicely weighted toggle switches which are retro fun. Finished off with some blingy chrome trim (yes, another option) the interior is top notch and shames many much more expensive cars – but it has to be said, careful and quite costly speccing is required to get the interior up to this standard. As usual for a MINI hatch, rear seats are for short journeys or amputees only – though if you really need a little bit of extra space, you can always go for the longer MINI JCW Clubman.
The sports seats grip nicely – though really at this price an awesome set of Recaros should be standard and the quality of the leather is nothing on the gorgeous hide you get in, say, Alfa Romeos. But after a long journey, you never get any aches and pains, and the dead straight driving position and chunky steering wheel makes the MINI a surprisingly good long distance companion. The ride is firm but well damped and not uncomfortable. The only blot on the refinement landscape is the wind roar from the upright windscreen. Said windscreen also conducts a wholesale massacre of flies in summer, so buy shares in companies that make screenwash.
Spec the very expensive nav system and you have plenty of gadgets to play with on the central screen, round the perimeter of which the speedo needle floats. This looks very futuristic at night, but in truth it makes a useless speedometer, being hard to read and away from your line of sight. Luckily, you can select a digital speedo readout in the rev counter pod above the steering wheel. The sat nav is no great shakes, and the joystick interface is a bit fiddly – navigating around the menu options is not at all intuitive, but let’s face it, it looks a million time better than a Tom Tom and a sucker and no one can nick it.
With your iPod plugged into the USB port, you can select any Playlist, Album, Song or Genre using the joystick and screen. The ease of use depends on how many songs on your iPod – with my 16GB iPod Touch almost full, selecting the artist Zhane is fiddly to the point of perilous distraction. There is no excuse for parking bumps in such a short car with parking sensors, which comes with a natty graphic that grows, going from green to amber to red the closer you get to the car behind – the end result is very much like a rasta’s hat.
The Upgraded Hi Fi system is a little disappointing – it is very sensitive to the quality of your source material so low quality mp3s will sound particularly flat, recent iTunes purchases not bad, and a CD reasonably good. It seems to cope better with the higher frequencies so indie fans will love the detail in guitars and percussion but R&B fans like me may find the bass a little wanting. MINI have moved to a new Harmon Kardon system as an upgrade option which is apparently a big improvement.
Funding It
Yes, it cost £26 big ones after options and discount, but once you have added MINI’s TLC servicing pack at £185, servicing is covered for 5 years or 50,000 miles. Save up for new tyres though – the runflats cost a bomb but are very welcome when you do get a flat. 35mpg is excellent given the missile like performance, my London driving excursions and judicious use of the sport button. The MINI holds its value well but spec it much beyond what’s in the Chili pack and you can say goodbye to the vast majority of the rest of the money you spent on options. I know this from experience, but hey, life is short and I like my gadgets.
Faults
None. Zilch. Nada. The JCW was perfect on delivery and has behaved impeccably since. Here I must touch wood because I have had my share of MINI maladies in the past, mostly on my naughty 2004 Cooper. There’s a real feeling of solidity, and fit and finish is an improvement on my second generation 2006 Cooper too, which suffered only very minor flaws. MINI really do seem to have the quality sorted at this point.
Verdict
Yes it’s expensive, but the combination of performance, quality, cheeky modern retro style and feisty character for my money is unmatched. This is a MINI which can pootle round town, then, at the touch of the Sport button, play with the big boys in the overtaking lane (at 69mph, of course, your honour). It handles slickly, the pops and burbles from the exhaust are addictive, and really, you shouldn’t be having this much fun with your clothes on. Suddenly, that steep list price seems entirely reasonable.
